I once almost took my own life. I was in a terrible place. There seemed nowhere to go. Trapped. My mind telling me terrible things about myself.
I didn’t pull the trigger. I reached out for help. I did a lot of counselling. I saw a psychiatrist. I started a medication. I recommitted to a regular exercise routine. I stopped eating crap. I started volunteering and committed to community and not isolating myself when I felt shame.
These things and more - bathing in the unconditional love and support of my family and close friends - have been transformative these past years.
Today I could not be at a more stable and content place in my life: A beautiful loving partner, cuddly fur babies, a meaningful vocation and a safe home to live.
Stigma kills.
If you are in a dark place please reach out. Here at North Island Community Health Centre we are here to help: Counselling, support, community, coaching and yes, when needed, medications, are all options we offer.
But it cannot always be up to the person to seek help. Sometimes we find ourselves unable to help ourselves or even take that step of asking for help.
Here in Port Hardy, amidst an unprecedented crisis of deaths of despair these past months, we are wrapped in options for support - be it for youth at the Foundry, the Indigenous community at Sacred Wolf Native Friendship Centre and the health centres in our reserve communities, or the broader community at the Mental Health and Substance Use office or North Island Crisis and Counselling Centre, let alone our own North Island Community Health Centre. I have worked as a doctor for the past 12 years across four provinces and I have never worked somewhere with so many options for mental health support. Still, people fall through the cracks and too often these various services go under-utilized. Further, there remains too much stigma attached with mental illness and mental anguish. I myself am aware that I may suffer professional consequences for writing so candidly about my experience with suicidality here.
As mental health-care providers, it is incumbent on us to continually strive to meet patients where they are at. As a medical doctor, I don’t get paid for any of my ‘online’ presence however I spend hours each day doing outreach and advocacy work in social media spaces to try to connect with patients and our community. I truly believe our patients and community benefit from these efforts.
Part of meeting patients and our community where they are at is seeking feedback and adjusting services. What I continue to overwhelmingly hear, is that we need a 24/7 sports-accessible, safe space for our youth. This is not complicated. You cannot build an office and expect people to just show up. We must all strive to do better and meet people where they are at. Stigma gets in the way of asking for help far too often.
I am always grateful to receive positive feedback from many of my patients and our community. Sometimes I receive negative feedback, and, while I may not always agree with it, I always try to reflect and learn something. The most challenging cases I have faced as a doctor involve patients and their families where chronic and recurrent suicidality is an issue. Sometimes I am outright blamed. This may co-exist with ‘Borderline Personality Disorder’, a treatable condition characterized by an unstable sense of self, recurrent self-harm and suicidality. Fortunately this condition responds well to treatment with ‘Dialectical Behavioural Therapy’. If you suspect you or someone you love is struggling with ‘Borderline Personality Disorder’ please reach out for help - we are here at North Island Community Health Centre including daily walk-in clinic, and will do our best to help you navigate this challenging diagnosis.
I have heard the esteemed Dr. Gabor Maté say on several occasions that the opposite of addiction is connection. The same goes for suicidality - it thrives in isolation. We can overcome our unprecedented current crisis of deaths of despair by connecting in community, together. Every effort counts.
For ideas/topics you would like explored, please email suggestions to: alexnatarosMD@gmail.com or find me online Facebook/Twitter “Alex Nataros MD” Note this is Not for personal medical questions – for these you should present to clinic/emerg or call 8-11.